My mom wants to call my personal loan?
Sunday, 29. August 2010
My mother made a personal loan to m 6 years ago for ,000 from an equity line of credit. I used it for school and to purchase a condo. Now that the market has crashed, my homes’ value has fallen 50% and I will likely opt to liquidate the property for a loss. (I am a licensed real estate agent.)
A financial planner told her that it is in her best interest that I pay off this loan ASAP because the the bank could demand immediate payment in full at any time and if I didn’t have the money then she would have to pay it from her own savings.
As a result she has rallied all my brothers and sisters to pressure me into returning home to live there until I can pay off the ,000 by basically giving her all my earnings until the loan is paid down.
As much as I want to pay the loan off fast, I am 29 years old and I do not want to move home with my 2 younger brothers and parents. In a 2 bedroom house, I would basically be living in a tool shed until I’m in my early 30s.
I do not think it is fair that I should be made to feel guilty for what has happened to me due to the economy, or what could potentially happen to her for making this loan to me. She tells me, "I feel I will never get that money back" It saddens me to think that she doesn’t trust me but I do not think it is fair for her to put such a huge responsibility on me and expect me, a single, 29 year old, to move home for a few years and give her most of my earnings.
What should I do?
The reason I haven’t paid the loan down is because I have paid off my high interest credit cards first, and then real estate market has crashed leaving me with just enough money to make interest payments and live on. Now I intend to find a stable job in the next two months unless I can start to make money.
She is trying to accelerate the loan. There was never any agreement to do this. If a bank tried to do this it would be called "loan sharking."
i + i Says:
I have no sympathy for you and I believe your mom is perfectly justified in her belief that she’ll "never get that money back". If you were a licensed real estate agent then you HAD to know that the value of what you were buying was severely inflated and you were just contributing to the problem.
Judith Says:
No matter how you put it you are wrong. You are upset that she would put such a huge responsibility on you. You accepted the responsibility of paying her back when you accepted the loan. The fact that you chose to pay others instead of your mom kind of makes her concerns valid.
I would not trust you either. You put yourself in this place by making bad choices. Neither your choices or the bad economy is her fault.
She has earned her money and saved and worked to get where she is today and you have taken her safety net away from her by refusing to repay the debt. She can’t go out and earn the money again.Nor should she have to. In not repaying the loan until you get ready you are causing a rift in the family that you will have a hard time fixing. You have used your mom.
What the family is asking is not only fair but just. The reason you don’t want to go home is because it would be embarrassing and you would feel like a punished kid. Well you have acted like one. Bite the bullet and go home, pay off your mom then start over on your own dime.
virus from grocketmail.com Says:
Living at home obviously is not a cup of tea for you, but sometimes you just have to deal with it brother.
My dad loves it when I complain about things because he always has the same question:
Does your problem have a solution? If yes, then why are you worrying about it? If no, then why are you worrying about it?
When life gives you lemons, find a new life or make lemonaide. So many more cliches, but just remember brother, it can’t always rain. I remember when I was making burgers for a living and just thinking of doing that day in and day out is enough to snap me out of the woah is me attitude.
What I am trying to say, is that you really are stuck between a rock and hard place and its only right for you to go ahead and do right by your mom. I don’t know how you are to do it, you seem more financially savvy than me, but deep down inside, find whats right and do it. You can’t always have what you, so be happy with what you got.
Mr Warrior Says:
oh please , cut the rubbish and admit u made a mistake by borrowing money from mummy and not paying it back.
Anyone else and u would be out on your butt anyway with nowhere to live. Even if u borrowed that money from a bank and could not pay it they would demand their money back if u could not pay it and throw u out.
Your mum is protecting her investment and or money by making u responsible for your decisions. A bank would do the same.
So u are expecting a "favour" from your mum to get u out of this mess your in and relying on motherly love to get u through it. But u know what. Its not your money! Its hers and potential inheritance for the other kids.
Yeah the economy is in a bad state but tough luck. Thats the way the cookie crumbled. How many retirees have lost their superanutations cause the stock market crashes and have had to go back to work at age 65-70 .
If u think u got it bad , there are alot of people that have it worse. you just want mum to bail u out of your responsibility u have in paying th money.
You chose to have high interest credit cards she did not decide it for you.
You made a wrong investment decision and now u have to pay for it. Your lucky she does not disown you not for the loss but for the disrespect your showing her.
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